Shocker II

Well… Here it goes  as a follow on from Shocker. (see earlier post) . we have the sequel .... Shocker II!

Was out on Saturday night and whose mohicanned head should bob up above the crowd?.. Alex

I pointed him out to Jackie – a very good friend I was with. (I had recounted the story of my shocker night to her, with much hilarity.. on her part... and a bit of embarrassment on my part!).

So seeing Alex, I thought I had better do the right thing and apologise for my wayward behaviour.  If nothing else, to clear the air, since we are obviously going to be bumping into each other in the future.

So I come out of hiding under the snooker table and went up and said ‘I am sssoooo sorry.. I was so drunk’….

When I realise that he was wazzocked himself and he didn’t seem to know what I was talking about… and just flung his arms around me like a long lost love saying my name.

So much for feeling awkward and embarrassed – I don’t think he even remembers.  Or if he did any alcohol he had consumed that night was doing  good job of stopping any synapses firing on that particular memory.  Perhaps it was so bad his mind had sub-consciously erased it to avoid being scarred for life!

So all good  (well kind of).  Jackie was prodding me to take it further with him, but after extricating myself from his hug, Jackie and I sauntered off together.  It’s not often I get to hang out with a girlfriendiIn the evenings, and we were having a lovely time together.

After another drink, a dance and a chat we sauntered back upstairs….  Just in time for me to see Sean being ejected by the bouncers .   Jackie gave me a nudge in the general direction of the exit to go and sort him out.. and somehow I ended up escorting one rather inebriated man back to my house.. a  5 minute walk ending up being more like half an hour as he pinballed down the pavement of Port Douglas.. with me in my high heels trying with all my might to keep the ricocheting body in vertical stance – no easy feat.

I do worry about the repercussions of taking inebriated men home… with memories of Phil (yep.. that’s another story) mistaking my wardrobe for a toilet (luckily I woke up in time to guide said disorientated man to the right place).  I obviously realise that sex is a no no.. and actually, sadly quite like the idea of spending the night with someone without having to go through all that extra hoo haaa.

So sure enough the moment the bed was there and a chance to get horizontal it was the bed bungy jump without the bungy and nose diving into the pillow.

So for the second Saturday in a row ended up sleeping with all my clothes on serenaded by drunken snores.
I was woken by my hand feeling wet… yep… looked in the direction of the wetness and there it was -  my bedroom had developed a water feature that looked suspiciously like those fountains of those little boys peeing.  There was an ever growing dark wet patch spreading across the duvet……

I jumped up and there I was at 4 in the morning with handfuls of tissues trying to ebb the flow as a steady trickle like a little bubbling brook was dribbling steadily out of the end.  Flashes of the Dutch story about the guy who put his finger in the dyke to stop the leak.. that wasn’t an option, but kept the tissues coming.
I only had one day, Sunday, to wash and dry all the sheets and duvets etc as I have more people renting the room on Wednesday and so all the linen has be ready. Yikes.

So at 5.00 am I am whipping off the coverlet and jamming it into the washing machine.  Praying  that it would be sunny day and not a rainy one, otherwise I wouldn’t have a hope of drying it in time.
The moment Alex awoke I rolled him over (luckily the king size bed is made up of two joined single mattresses) and took out the mattress for a good disinfect and clean (and dry).. plus all the sheets.. yep, so that was a romantic morning!

We did have a little kiss, cuddle and an intimate time, but when he asked me for a blow job I couldn’t face it…   Spent most of the night watching it wreak it’s destruction so it wasn’t exactly my best friend!  So I said ‘next time’..  

From the last time when he took off and disappeared before I woke up this time he was determined to hang on like a limpet.. as I cleaned and laundered around him he just lay on the other mattress not getting my subtle hint that probably his welcome had expired.

Well, I think all ended Ok..  he went off to work..  I don’t even think he knew that he had wet the bed.. he certainly didn’t mention anything to me or apologise.  I didn’t want to say anything to embarrass him.. so maybe it will be him coming to me next time with a ‘soooo sorry!’ .

Now I did mention a few things in this that you would have picked up on that last Saturday I had another bit of a shocker.. seems to be shockers all round at the moment.

After my mammoth rejection from Mr PADI… this downward sinking spiralling gut feel that all was not well I arrive back in Port Douglas and go out.  Who should wander in but an inebriated Paul… (previous blog Paul.. June 6th).  Now Paul is a player.. he certainly played with me.. but what does a good looking 26 year old want to do.. when he has girls throwing themselves over him!  Because I am a ‘friend’ we have had our shinnanigans and actually get on very well.  So we did have a chat.. I chatted.. he swayed and chatted! 

Now, the thing about pubs up here is that if one is one degree off the perpendicular .. or moving towards the 45 degree angle.. then being that the force of gravity is constant, but the imbibing and effects of alcohol isn’t… then ejection is guaranteed.

As such.. there was Paul being forcibly ejected from the premises.. with flip flops thrown unceremoniously after him.  So being the maternal, caring person that I am I collect his flip flops.. get a taxi.. and seat him in a taxi.  His pleading as he leant forward to ask me to come home with him I resisted until in his enthusiasm his leaning forward so much meant he put his torso on the handbrake and the car started to roll…….
I leapt the taxi driver.. and I leapt into the other side.

Went back to Paul’s then crashed on the bed.. and enjoyed just lying next to another body.. with nothing happening….  Except Paul’s rhythmic snoring.

So two Saturday nights in a row I have been seen to follow closely on the heels of an ejected drunken person.  The bouncers must be thinking that this is my modus operandi.. wait until a young man is drunk and ejected .. and then follow closely in pursuit … haha.. give me a few more years and I might have to think about that technique!